neurotica

This week was Tim's and my 15 year anniversary, so I am writing this as a gift to my husband. Though we’ve known each other over half our lives now, we had our first date 15 years ago, March 1-8, 1993. Our first date lasted a week.

That was back when I still lived in Bellingham & was the editor of The Echo newspaper (anyone remember that rag?). Due to an arrangement with an advertiser, I had use of a cottage on the Oregon coast. I was 6 months into being a newly single parent, so I was very tentative, but Tim & I had been dancing around the obvious for awhile. I summoned my nerve & invited him to join me at the cottage. I’ll never forget how excited and nervous we were on that long drive to Newport, OR.

There was so much magic that week. The dunes, the endless beach walks (including the discovery of a beached ship, the Perseverance, which we took as a sign), cooking together, finding that rare Redd Cross album. And more than anything, the way we found that we fit together, in so many ways, in such a natural way. And so much laughter. My face ached from all the smiling.

When we got back to Seattle, it was hard to part ways, but I had to get back to my baby in Bellingham. I’d never been away from her that long before. After I returned to real life, I was filled with fear and doubt. But I got home after my first day back at work & found a vase of irises on my front porch with a very sentimental note.

From then on, we put a lot of miles on Tim’s VW bus & my old Toyota wagon. We never went more than 3-4 days before one of us made the drive. This went on for about 4 months before I manufactured a business opportunity in Seattle and started house hunting. Larkin & I moved into a wonderful duplex in the Wallingford neighborhood in July of ‘93. Tim moved in with us on a more permanent basis 6 months later. We eloped 2 years later and were married in the living room of the cottage in Newport, where we had our first date.

What are the lessons learned after 15 years? Patience. Communication. Humor. Romance. Keep the love at the forefront. Keep the family there, too. Keep the passion alive. More patience. More humor. Don’t give up; keep trying. Listen. Listen. Talk. Listen. Listen. Talk. Even more patience. More passion. More humor. Perseverance.

I still can’t say that I believe humans to be one of those very few species that naturally mate for life. But I can say with all assuredness that if it’s possible, I found the bird to fly there with.

Happy anniversary, Tim. I love you, honey. -k8-